Good morning love

I want to go lay up under him so bad. Nuzzle in his neck. Deeply inhale his scent. Love on him. Be rubbed on. Be loved on. But he never gives that. Has never given that. I want what I've made up. I want what I want. Not necessarily from him. But from him. Make sense. But the risked compromise. Is it worth it? The risk of being unfilled. I know if I go there, the two shall become one. And we don't even belong to each other. When his need is met he is gone. Disconnected. He proverbially pushes me off to the side. He no longer needs me or wants me. I'm hanging there grasping, still longing for him. His touch. Right back at square one. Feelings and emotions marled. So the compromise, it's not worth the risk. He says he can fix it. But what if he doesn't? What if he can't? Because he hasn't yet. Or maybe he won't. So the compromise, it's not worth the risk. So here I am climbing into the lap of The One who knows. With clean hands. Free from this, at least. I climb up and nuzzle in his neck. Deep inhale of His love and compassion and understanding. Creator of all things. Including me and my feelings. I climb up and I tell Him. God this is what I need right now. He knows. God this is what I want right now. He knows. God this is my desire. He knows. He holds me. He rubs me. He loves me. He strokes my hair, rubs my face, and He kisses me. Uncompromised. Never failing. Never ending. Undying. He loves me through this and He fulfills me. Makes me whole. Tells me how beautiful and wonderful and perfect I am. For Him. And to Him. He made me. How can I not be all those things. He fulfills me. And He restores me. By His Spirit. He strengthens me. Be of good courage daughter. Greater is Me in you. I will never leave you nor forsake you. Come to me. Rest. Let me cover you. I will cover you.